drea*s rants

one evening’s love starts with a kiss

morelloallen — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 00:42:21 +0000

Dave Matthews Band has been my favorite band since … well since forever. They’re back on tour and will be hitting up Florida in August. I, of course, will be attending! I’ve been listening to some old Dave songs and some new ones to get into the spirit of the show that is rapidly approaching. One song in particular plays over and over again in my mind so I’ll share it with you. Enjoy!

So here we are tonight, you and me together
The storm outside, the fire’s bright
And in your eyes I see whats on my mind
You’ve got me wild, turned around inside
And then desire, see, is creeping up heavy inside here
And do you feel the same way as I do now
Now lets make this an evening
Lovers for a night, lovers for tonight
Stay here with me, love, tonight
Just for an evening
When we make our passion pictures
You and me twist up as secret creatures
And we’ll stay here
Tomorrow go back to being friends

But tonight let’s be lovers,
We kiss and sweat
We’ll turn this better thing to the best
Of all it can offer
Oh, this rogue kiss
Tangled tongues and lips
See me this way
I’m turning and turning for you
Just tonight

Float away here with me
An evening just wait and see
But tomorrow go back to your man
I’m back to my world
And were back to being friends
Wait and see me,
Tonight lets do this thing
All we are is wasting hours until the
Sun comes up its all ours
On our way here
Tomorrow go back to being friends

Tonight lets be lovers, say you will
And hear me call, soft-spoken
Whispering love
A thing or two I have to say here
Tonight lets go all the way then
Love I’ll see you

Just for this evening
Lets strip down, trip out at this
One evening’s love starts with a kiss
Run away

And tomorrow
Back to being friends
Lovers…love…lovers
Just for tonight, one night…love you
And tomorrow say goodbye

once upon a time

morelloallen — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 21:32:47 +0000

If this isn’t the best fairytale, I don’t know what is…

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl ’Will you marry me?’

The girl said: ’NO!’ And the girl lived happily ever-after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, didn’t get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, didn’t save money, and had all the hot water to herself. She went to the theater, never watched sports, never wore friggin’ lacy lingerie that went up her ass, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants and was pleasant all the time.

The End

this man is a genius

morelloallen — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 16:56:27 +0000

karma is a spiteful bitch

morelloallen — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 00:44:07 +0000

Karma is a spiteful bitch and I love her for it! Seriously though, the irony of it all is almost frightening. I wish I could revel in all things vengefully karmastic* today; instead I find myself just not caring… at all.

That’s how karma works I suppose. She will give you exactly what you wanted at the exact moment you no longer care.

What a bitch!

* Yep I said karmastic… I’m pretty sure I just made that shit up. Awesome!

caught in the rabbit hole, forever in wonderland

morelloallen — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 16:56:15 +0000

I believe that the seven wonders of the world are; to see, to hear, to touch, to taste, to feel, to laugh, and to love.

These wonders of the world can so easily be found in our everyday, seemingly mundane, lives. If you let your mental guard down, open your heart, and have enough patience to be “in the moment”; it is possible to hear, feel, touch, and love all that is around us.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the beach, I had sunshine on my face and sand in between my toes. In the not so far distance I could hear children gleefully playing and teenagers gossiping about their previous school week’s events. I inched closer to the ocean with naked feet touching the warm sand. I made my way just enough so that I could wade in small pools of
water that gathered at the shoreline. The movement of the waves, strolling up the coast and withdrawing back into the ocean was mesmerizing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My son John and I made way to the backyard of our home with a simple goal… to fly our kite. It was breezy and sometimes downright windy, but the winds were also few and far between. So we stood there, silently with our backs to the short gusts and waited. If you’re still enough, you can hear the wind approaching. As it caressed our backs, I didn’t even have to say a word. John knew to let it go in order to watch it whirl around and fly high. It was perfect.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Night has fallen and some of the most beautiful wonders of the world are just waking up. The stars in the sky, especially out here, are brighter than any I’ve ever seen. As I lay with my back on the grass, I think of simpler times and wonderful adventures. I imagine how the stars that I am staring at have always been there and know my life’s story as well as I do. I imagine that they too, stare at us in a knowingly manner and maybe, perhaps, smile back at us.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is just from one day in my life; imagine how many pages a week, a month, a year could fill.
Life is beautiful! La vita e bella!
Truly it is…
Take the time and enjoy the wonders in your life.

i’ve learned

morelloallen — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 16:55:20 +0000

When I hear people say they’ve opened a “new chapter” of their life, I can’t help but wonder if they’ve learned anything from their previous chapters.

I, myself, am starting a new chapter. A much needed fresh-start. This clean slate will begin tomorrow morning; the moment I open my eyes. I’d like to share what I’ve learned so far. This last chapter has taught me a lot and it both saddens me and relieves me that it is coming to an end.

15 Things I’ve Learned:

1. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. This is so true. As time goes by… it is another person’s humanity that sticks in my mind the most.

2. I’ve learned that its 10 times easier to fall in love than to stay in love. And no matter what the sad songs say about romance, broken hearts do mend.

3. I’ve learned that grudges are poisonous. The only antidote is to let them go.

3. I’ve learned that my child can teach me a thing or two about pure happiness. Whether its playing on the swing with him, staring at the sky, without a care in the world. Or standing outside trying to catch rain with our tongues during a storm. It’s ok to let go… and just live.

4. I’ve learned that sometimes all a person needs is another person’s hand to hold and a heart to understand. I had no idea that this could be true… but it is. I know I will find someone to lean on and effortlessly allow them to lean on me.

5. I’ve learned that life is tough, but I’m tougher. No matter how impossible it seems to come out on top of some of life’s disasters, no matter how big or small… I’m one tough cookie and will see it through. I always do.

6. I’ve learned that when you’re in love - it shows. It’s such a strong emotion… you can do anything when you’re in love!

7. I’ve learned that as I get older my heart remains soft and open while others may become guarded and jaded. You can’t fully love another with a guarded heart… and why would you want to?

8. I’ve learned that naps are not a necessity. It may be hard to just keep going and going… but as my cousin John once told me, “Live life while you can because you can always sleep when you’re dead”.

9. I’ve learned that laughter is without a doubt the best medicine. I’m not talking about stifled giggles. I’m talking about no-holds-barred, laugh so hard you cry, laughter. It’s incredibly liberating.

10. I’ve learned that nobody seems to give compliments anymore. I’m going to single-handedly bring that back.

11. I’ve learned that when my son seeks me out just to give me a hug, it is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

12. I’ve learned that although you may feel you’ve been wronged…sometimes being kind is more important than being right.

13. I’ve learned that when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

14. I’ve learned that not everything is black and white. Truth is, every story has three sides. Your side, their side, and the truth. And no matter how much you want the other person to see things your way the more they will retreat into their own version of the story.

15. I’ve learned you can either be your worst enemy or your own best friend. You can either get out of your own way and be free or constantly listen to that nagging thought that you’re not good enough. Its up to you to decide how you want to live your life.

toddler streaking

morelloallen — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 18:54:04 +0000

We’ve all heard it before; having a toddler in the house is a thankless job and can be tiresome to the point of exhaustion. What we rarely hear though, is that having this mini comedian in your home can also be extremely entertaining. Recently my two year old son has begun streaking around the house on a regular basis. While this may sound absolutely hilarious, it is also concerning for a parent. Is it normal for your toddler to strip down to his birthday suit every chance he gets just to run around the house? Is he just trying to get my attention? Is he done using diapers? The list of questions are never ending when you have a child, and even more so as in my case, when they are your first and only child.

As any constantly worried parent will tell you, the internet is your safe haven. If you research embarrassing toddler scenarios online you’ll not only find that there isn’t a topic that hasn’t been covered but more importantly, you’re not alone in having these issues. Having this knowledge assures you that you don’t have the weirdest toddler ever known to man after all. What a relief!

So why do toddlers streak? I consulted my best friend, the internet and a professional, my mother (she raised 4 children) to find out more information.

It may be time for potty training.

There comes a time when toddlers soil their diapers and it becomes uncomfortable for them. When toddlers disrobe, they don’t realize that they can simply just take off their pants and diaper. They feel if they are going to disrobe, they are going for the gusto by removing ALL articles of clothing.

It’s different when they’re naked.

Your toddler is still very much in his curiosity stage of life. He or she may know what it’s like to sit on tile floor with their clothes on, but what about naked? They know what it feels like to wrap themselves in their favorite blanket fully clothed but not what it feels like in their birthday suit. Not yet anyway! And that’s why they do it, to find out the answer to their curiosity.

Because it’s funny.

My son knows that seeing him enter a room sans clothes after I had just left him in the other room with clothes on, gets me laughing every single time. It has gotten to the point when I can tell he’s stripping down even if I can’t see him because I can hear him giggling from afar.

Ultimately, toddler streaking is a regular part of life and shouldn’t be read into too much by worrisome parents such as myself. Besides, who can’t use a good chuckle now and then? And who better to deliver that smile than an arm flailing, wildly running, naked toddler.

stupid idiom

morelloallen — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 15:53:36 +0000

The grass is always greener on the other side.

People say this idiom all the time in the hopes that it brings light to whomever’s darkness. What a bunch of crap! The grass isn’t greener on the other side. Sure…on the other side there is grass. Brown grass with weeds, ant hills, and dirt; just like the grass on the side you were already on.

We always want what we can’t have. The real kicker is that most of the time, we don’t even know we want it until someone/something tells us we can’t have it. It’s incredibly childish but none of us are impervious to the feeling of just wanting what we want.

I’m not saying its a bad thing to want, to dream, to hope. If you stop believing in that “other side” then what’s left? Absolutely nothing, and I get that! It’s just tiresome to constantly think to yourself that you have finally reached that green grass only to find out you are simply on somebody else’s raggedy old lawn.

counting sheep and other concepts that elude me

morelloallen — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 15:52:50 +0000

It’s amazing how certain things come into perspective when one gets a good night sleep. Usually I don’t sleep well because my thoughts don’t know that it’s bedtime. I say usually… but what I really mean is that I never get a good night sleep because there is always way too much to think about. Is this just a woman thing? I think it might be. Have you ever had a conversation with someone of the opposite sex; and if the conversation lulls just the slightest bit, they can close their eyes and fall asleep? I don’t care if this is your boyfriend, husband, or brother; for some reason the male species is able to fall into a peaceful slumber at the drop of a dime. Well…that’s bullshit! I mean, what goes on throughout their day? It must not be significant or thought provoking because they’re able to just shut it off and drift away to la la land. In the meantime, we sit there in bed at 3:30am thinking about if we should get gas on our way to work or during our lunch break instead.

How can one not dwell on the quirks of daily life before they snooze? For a woman, this can be such a tiring process. I am hoping that I am not alone when I say there is a laundry list of ideas and dilemmas that pop into my mind when time hits bed o’clock.Picture it! I’m snuggled in my bed reading a book and my eyelids are getting heavy. I have successfully allowed my mind to wander into some fictional world that I am reading about and have relaxed enough to fall asleep. I close the book, shut off the light, and settle in for a good night’s sleep. As a close my eyes I see my co-worker. It begins:

“What is she doing here? Oh yeah, that’s right… she asked me to remember to remind her of something tomorrow morning… What was it? Oh crap, what was it? Oh yeah, she needs me to do something for her but what? Shit! I hope I left a post-it to remind myself what it was…. Oh no!…I need gas… I hate getting gas! I only have like $30 bucks in my pocket until next Monday…. I need more money! Oh it’s OK… if anything I can borrow some money…but from whom? Everyone I know is broke. God… I feel so bad that everyone I know is broke. OK…. I’ll get like $15 in gas and grab some groceries with the rest and I should be good to go. I hope my son John feels better tomorrow. He has the sniffles again. I bet it’s from the daycare. I should really get him some medicine… I’ll never remember that tomorrow. Yes I will! Ahhhhhhhh……. time to sleep. Wait a minute!!! Do I have a doctor appointment tomorrow or is it Friday? Why don’t I write these things down?”

OK.. I think you get the idea.

My point is that life is complicated! And it seems, in my mind anyway, that a woman’s job is never done. If I could wish for anything (besides a gazillion dollars) it would be that I could have a woman’s thought process throughout the day and have nothing but male thoughts come 8 o’clock. I don’t mean to bash men, in fact, I am envious of them. Besides the blip of T & A that crosses their mind, I think it is a safe assumption that male thoughts consist of pretty much nothing when it’s time to go to sleep. I for one have no problem thinking about Jessica Alba’s ass for a minute or two if it means I will soon drift into a sweet slumber!

inching closer to the edge

morelloallen — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 15:44:55 +0000

GRRRRRRR! I have had it!!!

Every hair of every square inch of my body is on edge. Every fiber of my being wants to scream. I can actually feel my shoulders hiking higher toward my neck as they tense up a little more.

Ladies and gentlemen….I am having a BAD day! First of all, I woke up at 4:00am for no apparent reason. I take Ambien for Christ’s sake and I still can’t sleep peacefully. I was up every half hour checking the clock. For what? I don’t know. I finally gave up and dragged my ass out of bed to make some coffee. Where was my son John? Sound asleep not making a peep. Lucky kid!

I made my way over to my computer to check up on some bills that I know are due come payday this week. What a mistake! I logged onto my telephone provider’s site and saw that they have a hefty bill in the amount of $536 that they can’t wait to send to me. After closer inspection it looks like a customer service rep took all of my thoughts of services I MAY want and just added it to my bill. At that point my blood pressure was so high that I thought my heart was going to pound out of chest, jump into the computer, find that rep, and punch her in the face. The worst part was that it was fucking 4am. I knew I had to wait about 4 1/2 hours before I can call and scream at someone. So like any sane person….I obsessed about it for another hour. After a while though, I needed to take a break.

Since I do not have the luxury of plopping myself in front of the TV at night to watch mindless entertainment; I decided I would log on to some entertainment news sites. That’s when I saw it….. Britney Spears was lashing out at some paparrazzi guy HOLDING HER SON and every single word out of her mouth needed to be bleeped. What has this world come to and why is this white trash piece of work even allowed to see her children? Every single day I say a little prayer that I do right by my son. I try to be a good person, I try to do the right things, I go to work, I make him breakfast, lunch, dinner. I let him run amok through the house when I get off work (pre-baby this was when I would zone out and watch mindless TV goodies) and while he runs around I get everything ready for the next day to do it ALL OVER AGAIN. Now don’t get me wrong… the monotony is my own fault and my son John and I are working on changing that. What I am actually trying to get at here is this….. sometimes when I get home from work, I have to put John in his playpen to play by himself so that I can feed the dog, start dinner, clean the dishes, etc. Once all is said and done and he goes to bed, I beat myself up beyond belief because I feel like I put him on the back burner when he should have been front and center. I make myself feel like I have failed at being a Mom for that day because I just didn’t have the time to chase after him as he gets into everything he’s not supposed to. I do this…….AND BRITNEY DOES THAT? It is ridiculous!! I’m not sure who I am more mad at… myself or Trashy Spears! To make an already long story short(er), I knew it was time for me to move on from what could have been fun “Who’s having who’s baby now?” entertainment.

So, I moved onto myspace. SIGH!!!! MYSPACE!! I love it there… it’s where all my friends live. I go to log on and it tells me I have the wrong password. Well… that’s weird because I’m the only one who knows my password. After battling it out for over 45 minutes with Tom (not literally) I realized that I had been typing in my email address incorrectly……. GREAT! At this point in my morning I am now well into my 5th cup of coffee and I attribute my finding out I was misspelling the email address to that particular coffee cup. Without it, I think I would still be retarded right now. But by that time the little clock on my computer indicated it was 6:30am and the little squeaky noises that turned into screams from my son’s room told me it was time to eat and play.

Eat and play…. doesn’t sound like such a bad plan right? WRONG! My little destroyer ran through the house and messed up everything I had cleaned the night before. I tried to feed him but he refused. I even went for the ever loved apple sauce but he decided to use it as hair and body gel instead. So now… at 7am with only a half hour left before I have to leave for work, I have to give him a bath. For those of you who have young children you know that a bath in the morning is pretty much unheard of. They’re lucky they get one at night.. I mean come on… what do they do all day? Anyway, after pulling him out I got him dressed in 7 seconds flat, ran to the shower and somehow threw something together that was semi-professional and out the door we go! I strapped John in his car seat and realized I left the dog outside. I trudged back up to the door and let her back in, locked all the locks, and was on my way… AGAIN.

Now….I am going to leave you here at this story because the rest of it pretty much goes down-hill. Maybe I’ll write a part two… I don’t know if I have it in me. My Ambien is finally kicking in. All in all I should have known it couldn’t have been a good day. I mean… who wakes up at 4am and still can’t get to work on time when they have to be there at 8:30?